A spotlight on Dr James Dayer

Welcome to the team! Could you tell us a little about yourself and your previous work?

I’m a Clinical Psychologist with around a decade of experience in mental health. I started out working in a therapeutic community for a charity caring for children in care. I then worked in the NHS in several different settings, working with people to help them better understand themselves, whatever difficulties they may have, and how we can work together to help make small changes to help.
I take a humanistic and holistic approach, which helps me work proactively in a psychologically safe and trauma-informed way. People don’t exist in a vacuum, so I am passionate about working alongside the systems around them, such as family, school, work and healthcare, rather than treating difficulties purely at the individual level.

What are your goals and ambitions for your first year with the merged charities?

I have a few! I’m part of a project between the University of Surrey and the merged charities to achieve a Psychologically Informed Environment. This means that everything the charity does considers the emotional and psychological impact of their beneficiaries. The emotional toll of allergies can often go overlooked, which is why this is so important. My ambition for the charity is to use my skills and the resources from the University of Surrey, alongside the amazing team we have with the merged charities, to pioneer this approach with the allergy community. One of my main goals is to finish developing a digital Cognitive Behavioural Therapy intervention for people who are struggling with allergy related anxiety. Once completed, people will be able to access this intervention through our helpline, which professionals can signpost to if appropriate.

How can living with an allergy affect someone’s emotional wellbeing and day-to-day life?

It’s understandable that people with allergies often experience heightened anxiety, given the ongoing stress of checking for allergens or anticipating a reaction. Parents and carers can often find the responsibility of protecting their child whilst fostering their independence understandably very challenging. We must also consider cultural and social environments which, whilst we are making progress, still has catching up to do to be inclusive of allergies. This can leave people living with allergies feeling isolated which can heighten the emotional toll and burden.

Are there particular challenges you see people with allergies face that you think are often misunderstood?

Many challenges often go unseen:

1. The “invisible” nature of some allergies. While skin and respiratory allergies can be visible, you cannot tell from looking at a person if they have a food or other allergy or not. Someone may appear well while carrying serious risk. This can lead to scepticism when they ask for accommodations or explain their needs.
2. Social pressure and guilt. Declining food at gatherings, sending children home from playdates, or refusing a drink at work can feel like causing awkwardness or disappointment. Many people report feeling guilty for “making things difficult,” even when it’s essential for their safety.
3. Misunderstood severity. Phrases like “it’s just a peanut allergy” or equating allergies with intolerances or “being fussy” minimise what can be life-threatening conditions. Parents and individuals alike encounter dismissive attitudes that make seeking support harder.

As a professional, understanding the full extent of the burden that these challenges represent is vital to ensuring that you can meet someone’s emotional needs.

What role can psychological support play alongside medical care?

Medical care is essential for diagnosis, treatment and emergency planning. Psychological support complements it by addressing the anxiety, hypervigilance and social isolation that often accompany allergic conditions. Some vigilance is essential to safety, but excessive vigilance can lead to avoidance and withdrawal, which can narrow a person’s quality of life. This is where psychological support has a particular role.
Psychological support doesn’t always mean formal therapy. It can include well-designed self-help resources, peer support groups, or simply a better understanding of the emotional implications of living with allergy. Nor does it imply that difficulties are “all in the mind”. Vigilance, which can be a feature of anxiety, is protective and sometimes lifesaving. The aim is to help people stay safe without living in constant fear.

Is there anything you wish more people understood about the psychological impact of living with an allergy?

Two things stand out. First, the emotional burden of allergies does not disappear when the immediate danger passes. Protecting oneself is a sustained effort that touches almost every area of life. Patience, and being alongside someone during demanding moments such as going somewhere new for the first time, can be very valuable.
Second, there is often a sense of grief, whether the allergy developed in childhood or later in life. This can be grief for a lost or never-experienced normality, for spontaneity, or for the ways allergy can get in the way of friendships and relationships. It is an easily neglected emotional undercurrent and recognising it helps ensure people don’t bear it alone.

What would you like someone living with an allergy to know if they are finding the emotional side of it difficult?

There are four messages I’d hope patients hear from their healthcare professionals.

1. Their feelings are valid: Anxiety is a natural response to threat. It only needs attention if the balance between excessive safety seeking and quality of life becomes skewed.
2. They are not alone. Many people are navigating the same journey and support groups can offer connection with others who understand the burden.
3. Asking for help is reasonable and expected: Whether from a GP, a psychology professional or a charity such as Allergy UK incorporating Anaphylaxis UK. They are not on their own, and their wellbeing matters as much as their physical health.
4. There is hope: Many people learn to manage their allergy confidently over time without it limiting their lives.